A few days ago, during our year-end review, my fifteen-year-old son asked me a question that made me stop and smile in quiet disbelief.
Not about what I earned this year.
Not about where I traveled or what I was producing publicly.
He asked:
“What did you invest in this year? What do you own? And what continues to earn you when you're not actively working?”
It was an honest question. A leadership question. And I realized how difficult it would be for many women, even highly accomplished women, to answer this without hesitation.
Because it forces a different kind of audit. One that moves beyond income to structure. Beyond effort and in permanence. Apart from what an impressive year we had and what really changed beneath the surface.
Many high-achieving women will end the year with strong resumes, full calendars and enviable lifestyles, yet quietly feel more financially exposed than twelve months ago.
This is not because they earned less.
In many cases, they earned more.
But earning well is not the same as building wealth. And for many women, the difference only becomes apparent at the end of the year – when the numbers don't match the effort.
Versions of this conversation have come to me again and again in recent weeks. Senior professional. Founder. Women with strong personal brands and visible success. When the noise dies down and the year is honestly reviewed, a familiar pattern emerges: Income flowed in, but security did not deepen. Activity was high, but ownership did not increase. Visibility increased, yet financial flexibility remained fragile.
This is not a personal failure. This is a structural one.
Increasingly, that structure has been shaped by FOMO — not the loud, obvious kind, but the quiet, respectful version. Pressure to maintain a lifestyle indicating success. Saying yes to opportunities that seem prestigious. To maintain visibility even when unpaid or underpriced. Travel, organizing, generosity, aesthetics, and obligation are all justified as “part of the season,” while ownership is put off for later.
FOMO doesn't always look like recklessness. Sometimes it appears responsible, sophisticated, and well-intentioned. But when unchecked, it becomes one of the most effective ways high-achieving women destroy wealth while getting ahead.
For decades, women have been encouraged to measure progress through earnings, titles, and lifestyle improvements. We celebrate promotions, appreciate detail and equate busyness with advancement. But we rarely ask the quiet, hard questions: What do you have? What are you creating beyond income? Who protects your options when life changes unexpectedly?
The inconvenient truth is this: Many women are earning well inside systems that leave them economically vulnerable.
Exposure shows up in different ways. It appears when a woman realizes that her standard of living is not one that she can maintain independently. When generosity outweighs structure. When visibility trumps pricing and compensation. When liabilities quietly begin to exceed assets. And when life events, such as illness, divorce, caregiving, and professional setbacks, reveal how slim the margin for error really is.
It also shows up at the end of the year, when the spreadsheet refuses to lie.
The year end, when done properly, is not a financial summary.
This is a money review.
Year End Wealth Review for High Achieving Women
Before we step into the new year, it's worth pausing for a different kind of audit. Not to evaluate oneself, but to orient oneself.
ask yourself:
earnings vs ownership
What did I earn this year – and what did I have at the end of it?
How much of my income converted into assets, equities or long-term positions?
structure and stability
Even if my income stops, who will protect my choices?
Do I have the buffers – financial, legal and structural – for life's inevitable changes?
FOMO and lifestyle pressure
Where do spending decisions silently follow momentum rather than intent?
Which was justified as “part of the season” but which had no lasting value?
visibility vs value
Where did my visibility increase without fair compensation or leverage?
Does recognition translate into ownership, equity or strategic positioning?
Risk and Flexibility
Did I make financial decisions by design or under duress?
Am I in a position to stay in the money-building game despite setbacks?
These are not budget related questions.
Those are questions of leadership.
And the answers determine whether the effort flourishes – or is quietly destroyed.
One of the most persistent myths working against women's financial security is the notion that stability comes later – after the next promotion, the next contract, the next season of growth. But wealth does not automatically come with success. It must be intentionally designed, protected and managed. Without intention, high income often finances high risk.
This is why many high-achieving women feel uncomfortable even looking successful. They feel that something is missing. Not money, structure. Not ambition, but insulation. Not drive, but durability.
These conversations are often avoided because they feel uncomfortable. Questioning financial arrangements is often considered distrust. Preparation was mistaken for pessimism. But preparation is not negativity. This is dignity. It is the ability to choose without fear, to respond rather than react, and to remain steadfast as circumstances change.
Every year that income doesn't convert into ownership, leverage, or a long-term position is a year where efforts dissipate rather than compound. The exposure silently increases every year when financial decisions are driven by pressure rather than design. And every year, women are celebrated for earning, but being taught how to structure wealth is a missed opportunity – not just individually, but generationally.
Which brings me back to my son's question.
If the next generation asks you what you have invested this year – what you own and what you earn beyond your daily effort – would the answer make you proud? or uncomfortable?
That discomfort, if present, is not a judgment.
here is the information.
And information, used honestly, can be the beginning of a change.
The coming year will demand more clarity, not more hustle and bustle. More structure, more stress. More ownership, not just more income. Women who recognize this early will not only protect themselves — they will quietly redefine what success looks like for those looking behind them.
Wishing you an extraordinary year – not by default, but by design.
Udo Marianne Okonjo: President, Fine & Country West Africa. Founder, Radiant Collective Capital
